


Raining in Eos

by MellowCorn, natsora



Series: Elements of Ryder [4]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Blood and Gore, Blood and Violence, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Murder, Non-Consensual, Rape/Non-con Elements, Reekless Driving, Torture, Whump, half crucifixition
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-06
Updated: 2018-06-06
Packaged: 2019-05-18 18:47:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14858252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MellowCorn/pseuds/MellowCorn, https://archiveofourown.org/users/natsora/pseuds/natsora
Summary: The Tempest picked up a life pod distress signal on Eos. Ryder had a bad feeling about it. Cora disagreed with how Ryder wanted to handle it and went her own way. All hell broke loose.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MellowCorn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MellowCorn/gifts).



> Warning: Non Consensual elements / Rape / Torture / Graphic violence. Please read tags.
> 
> Sara Ryder belongs to Mellowcorn, I just play in the sandbox. She is also [@Seokanori on Tumblr](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/). Check out [the art](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/post/174630966996/my-collaboration-with-natsora-and-another-one) she has created for this fic!

Ryder paced the meeting room, a bitter taste in her mouth. She just had an overwhelming need to spit. 

_No, let’s be civilised and keep spit inside the mouth._

Instead, she exhaled, loud and audibly. Her eyes searched the team assembled before her. Her team but not quite her team either. A team that was thrown together, inherited from a father who she didn’t know, a team still on shaking foundations. With a shake of her head, she dismissed the thoughts. This wasn’t fucking time for introspection.

“So, a distress call on Eos,” she said, not a question but a statement. 

Harper took it as permission to speak. The blonde folded her arms across her chest, her weight rested on one leg, her chin lifted as she flicked her eyes between Ryder and the map of Eos.

“Yes, SAM was able to isolate the distress call two hours ago. I’ve given the order to change course to Eos,” she said. “We will be arriving in an hour.”

Ryder’s eyes narrowed. “You overstep yourself, Harper. I am the Pathfinder here.”

“But-“

“I am the Pathfinder,” Ryder repeated, her voice hardening with every word, “Is that understood?”

Harper stilled. For a moment, silence reigned. The others shifted uncomfortably. Ryder ignored the lack of acknowledgement and turned to SAM. “This is a distress beacon from a Natanus pod?”

“Yes, Pathfinder,” SAM confirmed. 

“It’s not a signal that can be replicated?” Ryder asked. 

Nyx started. Ryder’s eyes flicked over at the minute movement. Her mandibles flaring at the insinuation but she kept her mouth shut. Ryder nodded once. 

_At least she’s smarter than Harper._

“I will not rule out a possibility of the signal being replicated,” SAM went on.

Ryder tapped her finger on the console, her eyes on the map. She manipulated the map with her fingers, zooming into the general vicinity of the source of the signal. “This is Eos. We found most of the ark on Harvarl, not Eos,” she said. 

“But the Natanus could be jettisoning pods after being damaged by the Scourge,” Kosta suggested. 

“Ryder,” Nyx called, her dual-flanged voice buzzing the still air. “Please, these are my people.”

Ryder’s jaw tightened. 

_Why do they insist on talking when I’ve not asked a single question? Talk, talk, talk…_

She closed her eyes for a moment, shoring the crumbling walls of her tolerance. Exhaling again, the gears of Ryder’s mind began to turn, making plans, discarding many, developing contingencies and adjusted her strategy accordingly.

Ryder pushed off from the console, the taste still souring her mouth. She swallowed the excess saliva. Her eyes flicked up to meet Harper’s. She said, “This is the plan, listen carefully.” 

* * *

Ryder drove, two teams of six all squeezed into the Nomad. Harper, riding shotgun, was looking at her omni-tool. Her tapping on the tool slightly too forceful to be natural. Ryder frowned but she kept driving. She knew Harper would eventually open her mouth whether she wanted her to listen or not. 

A soft inhale. Ryder kept her head facing forward but her eyes darted to look at Harper. The sound was loud inside the Nomad. Nyx, Ama Darav and B'Sayle held their collective breaths, waiting. Drack just snorted, derision filled the noise. 

“Ryder,” Harper started. 

Ryder ignored her. Her eyes firmly fixed on the road. The blonde paused then her brows twitched, unused to being ignored. Still, a little silence never seemed to deter her.

“We can’t just shoot first and ask questions later,” Harper pressed on. “This is the turian ark, not a kett outpost.”

Silence. The Nomad rumbled on. 

"Ryder," Harper called again. 

More silence. 

"Ryder, did you hear me?"

“Harper, my word on this plan is final,” Ryder growled finally, fighting the urge to blast the bitch out the Nomad, crew member be damned. 

"Lead the second squad, make sure they get to the secondary position and we attack on my mark,” Ryder said, taking her eyes off the road to stare at Harper. 

5 metres, 10 metres, 20 metres. 

Harper remained stubbornly silent. Nyx, Ama Darav and B'Sayle all found handhold within the cabin and hung on. Drack had the widest grin plastered across his face. 

30 metres, 60 metres, 120 metres. 

The Nomad kept barreling on, Ryder’s foot on the pedal relentless and steady. Her breathing even and calm but her blue eyes burnt with silent fury. “Ryder, Cora, please!” B'Sayle whined, pointing at the road before them. “I don’t want to die like this.”

“This is just too good,” Drack rumbled. 

Harper broke, her eyes darted to the windscreen once, widening in horror. She nodded curtly. “Understood,” Harper spat, “Pathfinder.”

Satisfied, Ryder turned back to the front and went on driving. B'Sayle let out an explosive breath, “Goddess, you bitches are fucking crazy!”

* * *

Ryder signalled to Ama Darav and Drack. They nodded and moved out, weapons ready in their arms. Ama Darav covering the rear with his sniper rifle while Drack took point with his shotgun. Ryder took the middle with her rifle. 

“Pathfinder,” SAM said. “You are approaching the signal. It seemed to be coming from the deeper within the kett outpost.”

They dropped the second squad east, further away from the outpost. Cora took B'Sayle and Nyx with her without another word exchanged. Ryder knew they were both professionals, she hoped Harper knew how to keep personal separate from professional.

Ryder left the Nomad out of sight behind some outcropping of rocks. Her team would come in from the west. Both teams were to converge on the outpost. With a pincer attack, they would be able to trap whoever in there that’s fucking with her. 

It was a slow leapfrogging towards the entrance but they made it without triggering any perimeter defences. The holo-lock was a stubborn red. 

_That is the first sign._

Ryder jerked her hand at Ama Darav. The angara walked quietly, for a person so big, towards the holo-lock, his omni-tool deployed as he hacked his way through. Drack kept an eye towards their rear as she tapped her omni-tool. “Harper, are you in position?”

One second, two seconds, three seconds. Her brow furrowed. “Harper.”

“Yes, Pathfinder,” Harper replied, sounding a little breathless. 

“Are you in position?”

“Almost there,” she replied, movement of limbs obvious in the transmission. 

Ryder swallowed her rebuke. “We’re breaching in 60 seconds. Get into position.” Without waiting for an acknowledgement, she dismissed the call. 

_That is the second sign._

Her gut churned as it attempted to twist itself into knots. The whole thing felt wrong. Ryder had a job to do and she wouldn't let fucking feelings stop her. Ama Darav shifted, his boot crunching sand underfoot. It wrenched her attention back to the mission. The holo-lock now glowed a welcoming green. Her guts coiled tighter. Ryder kept her eyes on her omni-tool, the countdown from 60 seconds was still running. 

Three, two, one. 

“Breach!” she barked. 

Drack swung into action. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sara Ryder belongs to Mellowcorn, I just play in the sandbox. She is also [@Seokanori on Tumblr](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/). Check out [the art](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/post/174630966996/my-collaboration-with-natsora-and-another-one) she has created for this fic! 

“Cora,” Vetra shouted. “What the hell are you thinking?”

Cora’s face burnt, how they burnt with shame and embarrassment. They were out of position, completely, totally, utterly fucked. And to top it off, she fucking lied to Ryder, allowing the first team to breach the outpost on their own. 

“I fucked up,” Cora shouted, her face closed, her mouth twisted in a grimace. “Is that what you want to hear?”

Peebee threw a Shockwave at the mixed group of Outcasts before slamming her back against the cover. “Ryder is right,” she shouted across the space separating the two halves of the second team. “This is a freaking trap.”

Vetra and Peebee were alternating between reloading and shooting, while Cora was on the other side doing the same. “Yes, I know!” Cora yelled, throwing her frustration into the Singularity she flung at the Outcasts. 

Outcasts caught by it, floated into the air, leaving them helpless as Peebee and Vetra popped out to eliminate them. “We shouldn’t have helped those spirits cursed pretend colonists,” Vetra shouted. “We should be following orders.”

Cora growled and reloaded her shotgun. She didn’t need this, not this now. Every single fucking one of them questioning her decision. Her breath caught for a split second. _Maybe this is how Ryder feels all the time._

The thought flushed from her mind as quickly as it came. “Argh,” she screamed, giving voice to her frustration as she Charged. 

With a small pop as air displaced, she slammed into the Outcast, her shotgun greeting the human. One pull of the trigger and the head disappeared in a mist of red. 

Ryder just took and took and took. She took her rightful position as Pathfinder after Alec’s death, took control of the team, completely leaving her a useless second to a Pathfinder who hated her. What’s even better? She even took Harry Carlyle. Walking in on them, midway through something that was going somewhere. What it was, where it was going, hell was she going to know. At any rate, the door was not only close, it was fucking slammed shut in her face. Ryder had an arrangement with the fucking doctor and couldn’t handle competition. _No, that’s not right._ Ryder handled her like she handled everything else in her life, with a temper tantrum of a fucking kid. 

Whatever she wanted, Ryder took. _What the fuck is left for me?_

“Nothing, fucking nothing,” Cora growled under her breath, she regretted coming to Andromeda. “Fuck the Ryders.”

But Cora wasn’t an asari commando for nothing, she was groomed to lead, trained to be the best. She would prove to Ryder she was smarter, faster, better. But it fucking backfired. 

“Harper!” The voice came from her omni-tool. 

There was only one person who would call her that - Ryder. The battle still raged on about her. She reasoned it was dangerous to answer her omni-tool right then. Was it a live fight after all right? Cora turned and ignored the call. Her shotgun screaming her resentment. 

* * *

“Fuck,” Ryder cursed. 

_That is the third sign._

Harper wasn’t answering. Her amp burning the back of her neck, she checked her pistol again. She did that just a few seconds ago. 

“Fuck!”

Ryder forced her fingers to stop. She couldn’t afford to get into a repetitious fidgeting with her gear. Fear, like nothing she had felt before crawled up her throat, threatening to pour out of her mouth in a deluge of panicked howls. Ryder clamped her mouth shut. She wouldn’t give in, she couldn’t.

She turned and looked at Drack and Ama Darav. Both bloodied and bruised, ammo running low. The pair were at opposite end of the room from her, hoping to establish a crossfire to whittle down the opposite but there were just too fucking many. Ryder panted, and readied herself for another Charge. Her rifle and shotgun already empty and discarded at her feet, she drew her pistol. 

Then a krogan roar filled the room, pressing against her ears like a hammer to the head. Ryder winced but forced herself to peek over her cover. Drack was charging, Ama Darav fast on his heels. Ryder steeled herself to join in then her eyes caught something small, something orange. 

_Fuck, those are omni-grenades._

Sound grew hollow, time slowed. Reality narrowed as Ryder gathered biotics at her core. Neither Drack or Ama Darav could handle the omni-grenades. They neither fast enough nor do they have the biotics to Shield themselves. It was just the simple calculus of battle. She was the only one who could handle it safely. Tactically, it was sound. 

Decision made, Ryder unleashed her biotics. The world warped around her. Air shifted, her ponytail was a whip behind her. Her helmet was long discarded after taking a concussion round, the visor too shattered to see through. Ryder slammed into the turian holding the grenades. He gasped as air was squeezed out of his lungs. The omni-grenades beeping loud and insistent. 

_Fuck, he armed them._

“Get into cover!” she yelled. 

Muscle memory took over, her hand moved in a mnemonic she spent a year learning. She Pushed the grenade towards the Outcasts as she dragged Shield over herself. It was too much, too soon. The Shield was barely formed when the grenades went off. Ryder felt her back connecting with the sharp edge of a crate, pain flared up and down her spine. Her head slammed into the wall. Agony ripped across her skull. Then like a mech without power, everything went dark. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are always welcome!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for Torture, Rape, Non-consensual, Graphic description of violence in this chapter. This includes the art that's embedded in this chapter.
> 
> Sara Ryder belongs to Mellowcorn, I just play in the sandbox. She is also [@Seokanori on Tumblr](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/). Check out [the art](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/post/174630966996/my-collaboration-with-natsora-and-another-one) she has created for this fic!

_Where…_

Consciousness returned in layers. Sound was the first. It was far away and muffled, the persistent ringing driving her up the wall.

_What…_

Taste came later. Her mouth dry and filled with a taste so bitter, it made her gagged. Ryder tried to work up some spit to rid herself of it. No such luck. Her face twisted into a grimace and she endured.

_When…_

Then touch. Her head throbbed like the bass line. Her back screamed, sending spikes of electricity searing up to her neck and down to her hips. Ryder didn’t want to move. The pain was very persuasive, the depths of unconsciousness inviting and alluring.

_Why…_

Smell came home as well. Something sharp, pungent assaulted her nose. The odour overpowering and tying her stomach into knots. Ryder forced herself to breathe through her mouth.

_How..._

She opened her eyes, it was dim. Her lung laboured as she took shuddering breath after breath. What she saw wasn’t what she expected. Ryder struggled to sit up but she couldn’t. Her arms and legs burnt, being stretched as far as humanly possible from her body and then some more. A pain, deep and intense, radiating from the space between her legs. Every single shift sent a thousand daggers stabbing into her. Her heart grew cold, her mind froze, her lungs clenched. Ryder pulled at the restraints with everything she had, rage colouring everything but her efforts were feeble. A growl erupted through her throat as frustration at her own weakness mounted. Ryder tipped her head upwards, the motion made the world spun in lazy circles. It was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Ryder’s stomach gave up and she heaved. The contents of her breakfast spewed all over herself.

It was then she realised she was naked.

_What the fuck._

Fear, rage and impotence warred within her. For a split second, she was the little girl living in a home where nobody cared if she was happy, only if she was alive. Alive had such a loose definition in the Ryder home.

“No!” she snarled at herself. This was neither the time nor place to examined feelings long buried. _Feelings get you killed._ Look where feelings got her. _I should have let Drack and Ama Darav take the burnt._ Her heart clenched at that thought. That’s not her. Useless self-sacrifice was just that, useless. This was a decision made after taking all variables into account. She wasn’t sentimental, she was fucking pragmatic.

“Pathfinder,” SAM’s voice flashed into her mind, interrupting her rambling thoughts. “I’d suggest you save your strength. I’m doing my best to numb your ability to feel pain. You have suffered a massive concussion, your ribs cracked among various other lacerations and contusions.”

Ryder forced herself to relaxed. Naked, tied down, hurt and hungry wasn't the best way to start a jailbreak. “Where?” she rasped, her throat not managing more than a single word.

“I am not able to determine because you were unconscious. You were out cold for two hours. It is likely you are still somewhere on Eos.”

“Others?”

“I am in contact with the Tempest. Harper’s team were bogged down outside the outpost but had recently been able to rescue Drack and Ama Darav. They are currently making their way back to the Nomad.”

Ryder tried to calculate mentally. Hurt squad members, trek to the Nomad, driving back to Prodromos, then T’Perro’s incessant need to patch every single paper cut and bruise. She sighed.

_I’m fucked._

It’s nothing she wasn’t used to. She had always been on her own. There was nobody more reliable than herself. She would get her ass out of this shit or die trying. The first thing she tried was her biotics. Ryder reached into her core, there was a raging fire inside but it was a fire that scorched everything and everyone.

“Pathfinder, they have removed your amp, I do not recommend you attempt to use your biotics without it.”

Before Ryder could even sigh at the news, a light flickered on from overhead as a door slid open behind her. She winced, squeezing her eyes into slits.

“Ahhh,” a dual-flanged voice said. “Our guest is awake.”

Ryder craned her neck but the way she was tied down didn’t allow her to. Booted feet grew nearer, step by step. There were more than a pair of feet. Ryder counted five pairs of feet of varying weight.

A human female came into view. “Argh, boss.” She made a face upon seeing Ryder. “She puked herself.”

“Don’t worry about it,” the turian said, still keeping himself out of view. “We don’t need her to be in full health. We just need her alive for a little while, maybe a day or so?”

The others sniggers as they arrayed themselves around her. Ryder shivered, convinced it’s the chill. Then the turian finally came into view. Ryder’ eyes narrowed.

“Kaetus.”

“Ryder.”

* * *

She refused. Her teeth clenched so tight her jaw ached.

She rejected. Her fingers wrapped into her palm forming fists, cutting half-moons into her flesh.

She wouldn’t. No matter how Kaetus dragged his talons across her flesh. Skin parting, layer by layer. Ryder didn’t care if she was being peeled like an onion, epidermis to corium, through blood vessels, past muscles to bone. Ryder refused to give Kaetus the satisfaction to see her break.

Kaetus sighed and stopped, one talon almost completely sunken into her chest. Ryder could feel the tip of his talon skimming the surface of her beating heart. He pulled it out. Warm, sticky blood dribbling in its wake. She let out the breath she was holding and dragged lungful of iron-tinged air down her throat.

“Ryder, this is no fun,” he said.

Kaetus stared at her. Ryder’s eyes fluttering shut. Despite SAM’s help, the pain was just too much to be held at bay. Her body sleek with her own sick and blood. There was nothing that didn’t hurt. Kaetus had taken great pleasure in pressing against her cracked ribs till she felt something snapped inside. With every breath, she felt her lungs grazing against the splintered ends of her ribs, every single brush was a brush with death. It wasn’t going to take much more effort to collapse her lung and have her drown in her own blood if she had any left inside.

Ryder focused on her breathing. As long as she drew breath, she could get free.

In, out.

_Compartmentalise the pain. Pack it away. You don’t need it now._

In, out.

_Endure, endure. You can return the favour hundredfold, just endure._

In, out.

“Boss, she’s falling asleep,” another voice said.

Kaetus hummed. Ryder kept her eyes closed. “I have an idea,” the human female said. “It involve a hammer and a nail."

Ryder snapped open instantly. Her eyes sought the person the voice belonged to. The human female, dreadlocked and fair skinned, smirked at her. “Got your attention, didn’t I?”

The human walked over to a tray of instruments, not a single one had the pristine gleam that T’Perro took pride with her own. They were filthy and some rusty. “Boss, can I?” the human asked.

Kaetus hummed his approval and stepped back. He folded his arms over his blood splattered armour and waited. He was going to watch, they were all going to watch. The human took a rusty nail and placed the point against Ryder’s right palm. The scratch of metal on skin spurred her harder, stronger. Her hands opened and closed, shifted to work against the restraints but they held fast.

“Come on, help me,” she called before turning back Ryder. “You’re a right-handed right? Let’s see how much you like this. Siding with the Charlatan? This will teach you.”

Rough hands pried her fingers straight, exposing her palm. Ryder screamed her rage, her helplessness and if she was honest, her fear. The nail pressed against her right palm, digging and pressing. The human laughed as she picked up a hammer. She raised it high, as high as she could. Slamming it down but missing her mark, thudding on the metal table they tied her to. Unbidden, treacherous tears of relief pricked her eyes. The human smirked.

_Fuck, she has totally walked into bitch territory now._

The bitch brought the hammer up again before Ryder could steel herself, a meteorite crashed onto her right palm, white hot fire flared in its wake.

Ryder swore every single one of them would pay, starting with the bitch with the hammer.

The krogan returned her grin, his fangs all long and pointed. He wiped the spit with the back of his hand. “Boss, you had a go while she was unconscious, now it’s mine,” he said.

Kaetus looked at Ryder with almost pity in his eyes but he shrugged anyway. “Don’t break her," he said, shifting to give the krogan space, "Too much. I’m not done."

The krogan leered at her, his eyes roving over her naked body. It was so repulsive, Ryder gagged. “Get her legs,” the krogan instructed.

_No._

Two human males peeled themselves from the wall. With lewd grins on their face, they grabbed her thighs, while the krogan untied her feet.

_Fuck, no!_

Ryder kicked, she thrashed with all her strength but it wasn’t enough. Three pairs of hands forced her legs apart, baring her womanhood for everyone to see. She could endure everything but somehow this was the last bastion she had to defend.

The krogan let go and started prying his lower armour off. His armour fell to the floor with a clatter. “Maybe the boss has loosened you enough to take me, huh?” he suggested. The others howled with laughter as if it was comedic gold.

_No. NO. NO!_

Ryder pulled at her restraints. Desperation fuelling her efforts. All she managed to do was make all her open wounds weep again.

The krogan’s prime penis sprang free from the confines of his armour, already stiff and straight. Ryder’s eyes widened at the sight. It was double the girth and length of anything she had seen. Her breaths quickened. It would be impossible to take it without tearing.

“Never thought I’d get to fuck a Pathfinder,” he drawled, stepping up towards her. “Hold her legs!”

Ryder squrimed, she bucked, she twisted but their grip on her thighs was tight, tight enough to form bruises. The tip of the krogan's penis brushed against her entrance and she flinched. "Be glad it's isn't a batarian barbed penis," he said.

Then, he pushed. Ryder shrieked, her voice reaching a new octave. She felt it all, every single ridge, every single protrusion as the krogan pushed into her. It was relentless, inexorable as the tides. It did not end. Her vagina expanded to accommodate but flesh had its limits. It stretched, it pulled, and eventually it tore.

The krogan wasn’t done. He started withdrawing again. The frequency increased as he gained momentum. Blood providing the only lubrication. With each slap of his plates against her thighs, his rough hide rubbing her thighs raw. The krogan's grin grew wider even as his eyes were shut in pleasure while hers against the agony.

Snot, tears and blood were the price of enduring.

By the time the krogan roared his climax, his seed slamming inside her like a bullet, Ryder was only semi-conscious. Her voice no longer having the strength to give voice to her torment.

She didn’t feel when Kaetus tried slapping her back to consciousness. She didn’t hear Kaetus punching the krogan for breaking her. She didn’t feel when the human female perfunctorily slathered medi-gel over the worse of her injuries.

“Sleep tight, Pathfinder.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for graphic description of violence.
> 
> Sara Ryder belongs to Mellowcorn, I just play in the sandbox. She is also [@Seokanori on Tumblr](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/). Check out [the art](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/post/174630966996/my-collaboration-with-natsora-and-another-one) she has created for this fic! 

Ryder’s eyes snapped open. _Am I dead?_

Everything hurt. _Death shouldn’t be so painful._

Ryder blinked, vision clearing. “Thank you,” she rasped. 

“I am just doing my job, Pathfinder,” SAM said. “Keeping you conscious through that... is detrimental to your well being.”

Ryder grunted. The only thing that didn’t hurt was probably her hair. The worst pain coming from between her legs. There was already a slick mixed puddle of krogan seed and blood pooling on the table between her legs. Her breath hitched, she squeezed her eyes close. 

_Bitch, no fucking tears. Tears are fucking useless. Use the pain, draw strength from it. You are walking out of this place._

A quick check revealed they didn’t even bother to secure her legs again. 

_Fucking amateurs._

She tried to move her right hand, flames rippled up her arm. Her breath caught as pain overrode everything. If she wanted to get out of here, she had to get her hand free somehow. 

Ryder reached towards her core. The blue fire was raging as brightly as ever. If only she could harness it. As if reading her mind, SAM spoke up. “Pathfinder I do not recommend this-“

“SAM, I’ll die if I don’t. I have no intention of dying here,” she growled. “I refuse to die lying on my fucking back.”

SAM kept quiet. “How far are the others?” she asked. 

“They are having trouble pinpointing your exact location but I estimate they will reach you in two hours.”

“Too slow,” she spat, “Too fucking slow.”

Ryder took a deep breath to steel herself. “Switch profiles to adept.”

“Acknowledged, profiles switched. You have enhanced biotics strength now. But you are running the risk of brain haemorrhage using your biotics without your amp.”

Ryder didn't bother answer. What would be, would be. There was no way she was going out without a fight. With a quick burst of biotics, she pulled her left arm free from the restraint. That small gesture sent a jolt up her neck into her skull, impacting right between her eyes. Ryder winced, but she couldn’t stop, not here, not now. 

Another deep breath to shore up the tatters of her strength, she sat up as best as she could with one hand pinned to the table. Her left hand worked quickly to undo the restraint but the problem remained. Ryder glared at the nail. 

“Suggestions?” she asked. 

SAM was silent for a moment. Ryder blinked, wondering if she had blacked out and missed his response. “SAM?”

“Pathfinder," SAM answered, an odd hesitation in his usual neutral tone, "Removing the nail via the top of your hand will cause more damage, I suggest you pull your hand through the last bit of the nail.”

Ryder hummed, it was what she'd expected anyway. Huffing slightly, she stared at her mangled hand, ready to inflict more pain on herself. 

“Fuck this shit,” she growled. “I will do this.”

Her eyes scanned the room and she found a dirty rag. With the tips of her fingers, she snagged and stuffed it into her mouth with utter revulsion. Breathing through her nose, she squeezed her eyes shut. 

_Now, or never._

Ryder wrenched her hand free in a single burst of biotic strength. Wrecked flesh tearing, bones bent and splintered. Her cry muffled by the rag as her teeth bit down on the rag. The taste made her gag. A wave of dizziness rocked Ryder, her right arm clamped on the accursed metal table in a white-knuckled grip. Her breaths harsh as she spat the rag out. The dregs of whatever was left of her breakfast lurched out of her mouth. 

Ryder cleared her throat and stood properly for the first time in hours. Her legs trembled but they held. She blinked and searched for something to bandage her hand. Ryder found her armour, discarded in a pile. She would prefer to have a layer of hard ceramic plants between her and the elements, but she ached too much to put it on. Instead, she pulled on a ragged Initiative jacket and pants she found among the pile. Blood instantly staining the insides as soon as it made contact with her skin. She didn’t bother zipping up the front of the jacket or doing up the zipper on the pants. There was no real need, what was modesty, when they had seen, touch, ruined every single inch of her. Still, Ryder didn’t want to freeze her butt off when she stepped out into Eos proper. Vaguely she wondered where did all these Initiative uniforms come from, as she tore one shirt up to wrap her left hand in. 

Ryder looked at the nail still embedded in the metal table, her blood coating the rusty piece of metal. 

“Let’s get the fuck out.”

* * *

She held the hammer causally with her left hand, tossing it up and catching it one-handed. The guard outside fell with a thud when she stepped through the door to find him dozing off on a chair. One swift smash of the hammer was all it took, then crunch. Skulls were surprisingly soft after being tenderised by a hammer. As Ryder strode through the pre-fab as if she owned, nobody could stand in her way. Outcasts all fell at her feet without exception, her grin grew wider as the blood coated her clothes. Her silent killing spree was eventually discovered, but Ryder didn’t fucking care. 

The alarm blared overhead. Red footprints marked the dirty pre-fab floor, turning grey to a muddy wet slurry. Her clothes dripping a trail of blood of its own. Her blood staining the insides, their blood staining the outside. It no longer made a difference. All that mattered was who was standing in the end. 

The exit was right there in front of her. The holo-lock was a welcoming green. Kaetus and his remaining motley crew of five stood with him. And they were barring her way to freedom. 

She tossed the hammer. Up, down. Up, down. Red flew in an arc, splattering against her face and the white walls of the pre-fab indiscriminately. Her eyes were focused only on Kaetus, the krogan and the human female. She wasn’t interested in anyone else. 

Up, down. Up, down. The smack of the hammer’s handle landing in her palm loud in the silence. Ryder didn’t wait for an invitation, she Charged. 

Caught by surprise, Kaetus roared. “Get her!”

A grin so feral split her lips, blood colouring her teeth. A laugh so primal rang out, everyone but Kaetus hesitated. Ryder slammed into the krogan. Training telling her to take out the biggest threat first. The krogan wasn’t armoured, dressed only in his undersuit. The gleam in Ryder’s eyes sharpened. She met the krogan with the hammer drawn back. With biotics strength behind it, Ryder smashed it against his snout. 

Crunch. 

The cry that came from the krogan was only matched by the crow of satisfaction from Ryder. 

The others brought their weapons to bear. Ryder twisted and kicked the krogan in the face as she launched herself at one of the human males. Her thighs remembered the press of his fingers, his nails digging into her skin, muscles. 

Crunch, crunch. 

His skull caved with a couple of strokes. He fell, the thud was joined the singing aria of her body. Her muscles screamed and her bones ached, Ryder gathered it all up in her core, fuel for what she must do. 

Crunch. 

The hammer took the other one in the face, pulverising his nose. Another blow towards his temple finished the job. A second body joining the other on the floor. Ryder shifted the hammer to her right hand, pain flaring up her arm as she forced her fingers to wrap around the handle. Her eyes hunting for her next target as she bent to take a pistol from one of the fallen. Her fire raged on, burning every thought from her mind. 

“Please,” the bitch cried out as their eyes met. 

Ryder only bared her teeth in response. A flick of her eyes down towards her pistol, she confirmed it was still fully loaded but the safety was still on. 

_Damn fucking amateurs._

“Ryder!” Kaetus growled. It was so guttural Ryder almost couldn’t tell what he was saying. But she didn’t waste her energy on meaningless talk. They were all going to die, or she would. It’s useless to talk. What difference did it all make? 

_Nothing._

Ryder Charged. Then a force slammed into her, throwing her to the wall. She coughed, blood sprayed from her mouth. Her bad hand dropped the hammer as she tried to breath. Her lungs wouldn’t expand properly, gasps of breaths grew sickeningly wet and shallow. 

“Pathfinder, you have punctured your left lung,” SAM informed. “Increasing your pain tolerance.”

 _Fuck_

Ryder spat. A glob of red landed on the krogan’s bare feet. The fight couldn’t drag any longer if she wanted to walk out of here. 

The krogan smirked at her, acidic orange blood oozed from the gash she gave him. “Are you back for seconds, Pathfinder?”

His only answer was the bucking of the pistol. He crouched and rolled, dodging out of the way. Ryder flinched, surprised by how quick the krogan moved. There was no time to do more. The krogan roared as he Charged. Ryder matched him roar for roar, scream for scream as she launched herself upwards, biotics enabling her to move faster, further. 

Her pistol fired right at his skull. At first, the shots weren’t doing anything. Then, a fissure, like the earth cracking. Acidic orange blood spurted like lava escaping a planet’s core. 

Ryder kept pulling the trigger as she sailed in an arc over the krogan, his reaching claws missing her by mere centimetres. Ignoring the protests shooting up her arm, Ryder grabbed onto the krogan’s hump with her bad hand, fingernails digging for purchase. Without letting go of her pistol, Ryder hauled herself onto the krogan’s back. Her feet planted firmly on his shoulders, ignoring his sharp claws gorging furrows into her bare feet, Ryder emptied the pistol into the open wound on his skull. 

The krogan shuddered, a tremor that started from his head right down to his feet. His flailing slowly and eventually stopped. The limp bulk tipped forward, slamming face first onto the ground. 

Ryder kicked off at the last moment with a grunt, her only concession to searing pain, and landed with her feet sliding across the blood sleeked floor. She dropped the empty pistol and picked up the hammer again. Her bad hand held close against her chest, she pointed at Kaetus with the hammer. 

“You’re next.” 

Kaetus glared at her, eyes taking in the havoc she had wrought. His talons tightened around his pistol as he pushed the bitch in front of him. “Do your spirits damn job,” he snarled. 

She trembled as she was pushed, her boots not finding purchase on the slippery floor. Her pistol raised, but the muzzle wavered like a drunkard. Ryder snorted. She kept her eyes on the real threat as Kaetus shifted towards the side. 

_The time to use someone as a distraction has long past. You should have used the krogan for that._

Ryder reached into her pocket and pulled the nail out. She twirled it between her fingers for a bit, grinning as she did so. Her eyes darted to Kaetus. 

_Gotcha._

Kaetus raised his pistol and fired. Ryder grunted and pulled her Shield up. The bullet fell uselessly to the ground, it's impact rippled through the Shield but never penetrating. She wagged her finger at him. Her hand flashed out and a force a thousand times the gravity of Eos hurled Kaetus against the wall. Ryder kept the pressure up as blue flames licked up her outstretched hand. The wall screeched under the weight. It bent, it buckled. Then, plates cracked, carapace shattered, as a keen so loud and long escaped Kaetus’s mouth. 

Ryder sauntered, slow and casual. The closer she got, the more the pressure mounted. Kaetus gasped, blue blood oozing from the fracture lines crisscrossing over his chest. With her free hand, Ryder reached back, over his head towards his fringe. Her fingers wrapped around the longest shard of his fringe. Ignoring the dimming edges of her vision, she pulled. It flexed at first. Then, it bent but eventually as all things did, it broke. 

“No…” Kaetus gasped. “No more.”

Ryder rolled her eyes and flipped the fringe around in her hand. Her finger gliding across the sharp point of the shard in her hand. It drew a thin line of blood across her finger. Her eyes met Kaetus’s. 

“You do not fuck with the Pathfinder,” she growled, jamming the shard into his eye, angling towards his brain. Kaetus whimpered once, convulsing as she pushed the shard deeper, higher. Then, everything was still once more. 

_Fucking waste._

Ryder allowed her biotics to dissipate. She groaned, the tightness in her head reaching a crescendo. Eyes squeezed shut as she tried to hold herself together. 

Then, a thump dragged her attention back to the sole remaining survivor. Ryder eyed the bitch who had fallen, her clothes and skin coated with a mix of krogan, turian and human blood. She scrambled backwards, hands over knees, begging, “Please, please…”

The brief moment of weakness firmly under wraps again, Ryder turned to face the bitch. Her hand reaching for the nail again. Her eyes flicked between the bitch’s tears streaked face and her bare and unblemished hands. Ryder’s own hand throbbed, every pulse a reminder. 

_Do not leave your enemies behind._

It was a lesson drilled into her time and time again by the Alliance. And it made sense. The bitch sniffing and pleading was an enemy through and through. She was the one who mangled Ryder’s hand. She was the one who enjoyed every single shit Ryder had endured. She laughed. 

Now this snivelling mess before Ryder deserved nothing but all the time and patience she could spare her. Ryder wrapped her fingers around the nail. She Charged, heedlessly of how much her head howled. Ryder slammed her knee against the bitch’s solar plexus. A choked cry and the bitch doubled over, clutching her gut. Ryder straddled her, her knees against the bitch’s arms. 

“I’m sure you’re right handed too,” she said, blood dribbling down her chin onto the bitch’s face. “I am fortunately fucking ambidextrous!”

Ryder reared her good hand back with the nail sharp end first and slammed it into the bitch’s hand. She howled, how she howled. Ryder grinned but it fell from her face. She was tired, utterly drained. Her hand trembled, holding the hammer was impossible. She scowled at her own hand, bad hand be damned. The hammer slipped from her numb fingers. 

The human’s screams faded to mere whimpers. Still, they grated against Ryder’s ears. Without the hammer, she pulled at her biotics once more. 

“Pathfinder, I don’t recommend-“

“Shut up, SAM.” The bite of command still ringing true. 

The AI was mercifully obedient. Ryder pressed her good hand against the bitch’s forehead and without warning, she released a Lance at close range. A jolt of biotic sliced through the bitch's forehead. The back of her head exploded. Ryder closed her eyes as chunks of white bone and blood red brain matter coated her face and chest. 

With a groan, Ryder stood. She surveyed the carnage she left in her wake. Her legs struggled to hold herself upright, her eyes searched for the exit, finally snagging on the green holo-lock. It was so close all along. 

Then, she blinked. _What…_

“Pathfinder, you are-“

The rest of SAM’s words were lost to the roar of her lungs working. Her breaths quickening even though there were no more dangers. With a hand pressed against her chest to calm her racing heart, she staggered towards the exit. A fog crept over her mind, it forced all thought out. 

The green called to her, so her body, as battered as it was, obeyed. She pressed her hand on the holo-lock, almost slipping on her own bloody palm print when she rested her weight on it. 

As Ryder stepped through the threshold and out into freedom, a roar not from her head reached her ears. She blinked as something wet and cold pelted down on her. Turning her face up, she stepped clear of the pre-fab. Water, big and fat, wet and cold, ran down her face. It cleansed her of the blood from without but it did nothing for the blood from within. 

The black clamouring at the edge of her vision, the fog was all that’s left of her mind. Still, Ryder persisted, she endured. A large, white, vaguely familiar shape materialised before her. Ryder frowned but her legs took her closer and closer. 

Her bare feet gazed against metal and Ryder jerked her head up. She realised she was walking up the ramp towards the Tempest. The team hovering anxiously around her. 

_What the fuck?_

She was upright, wasn’t she? She was still fucking standing and walking, wasn’t she? Anger surged from nowhere, it's the remaining fire that still burnt within her. Her jaw set, her shoulders squared, Ryder straightened her spine and staggered on. 

All meaningless words and gestures ignored as she walked towards the shower. That’s all she wanted. A fucking shower. She was dirty, inside and out. Ryder needed to be clean, scrubbed and washed. 

As she made her way deeper into the Tempest, eyes unseeing of the team’s shock, Anwar's horror, Kosta’s chagrin and Ama Darav’s shame, blood trailing in her wake. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are always welcome.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sara Ryder belongs to Mellowcorn, I just play in the sandbox. She is also [@Seokanori on Tumblr](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/). Check out [the art](https://seokanori.tumblr.com/post/174630966996/my-collaboration-with-natsora-and-another-one) she has created for this fic! 

Ryder was winded, more than winded, exhausted, drained completely to the marrow. The lights flickered on the moment she stepped through. Her hand passed over the sensor. Water, warm and comfortable, poured over her head. Unlike the cold pelting raindrops, this lulled her into sleepiness. 

Ryder grimaced as she pressed her bad hand against the wall leaving a streak of blood wherever she put it. Her good one peeling the borrowed clothes off her body. The jacket was first, redder inside than outside. She couldn’t hold back the cry as the water hit her skin, the gorges and furrows she had collected. A tremor ran through the fault line running from her head to her toes. Ryder pressed her forehead against the wall, savouring the coolness as the heat from water relaxed her. The pressure in her mind didn’t ease like it usually would with hot showers. In fact, everything was all getting fuzzier and fuzzier. 

Ryder didn’t feel it. She didn’t feel anything at all. Not her knees slamming down onto the floor, not her head thumping down under the spray of water, not her body sliding onto the floor limp and boneless. She didn’t hear SAM calling T’Perro for help. She didn’t hear Nyx and Kosta pulling her up, carrying her wet and naked to the medbay. She didn’t hear the almost frantic bellow of Drack demanding to see her. 

She didn’t know anything for days and days after. T’Perro near constant hovering over her still body. The countless surgeries to repair the damage to her bones, muscles and skin. The religious application of medigel and dressing of wounds large and small.

Ryder didn’t know. 

* * *

“This is not right.” A voice drifted through her fog of calm. It was deep, grumbling and carried a tinge of anger. “Her body is fighting the sedatives. Any more is dangerous.” 

A pause. The beeps of machines behind her filled the space. Then, a sigh, long and tired. 

“What about you know about medicine? This is my job, to look after the Pathfinder and the crew. Whether she likes it or not, Ryder is also my responsibility. I intend to discharge my duty to the fullest of my capabilities,” a second voice said, this one slow and calm but somehow it grated on her ears. “You know how she is, she wouldn’t even allow me to stitch up her wounds much less, operate on her, if she isn’t sedated.”

The first voice growled a sound of complaint. “It’s been seven days. That’s enough time. She doesn’t need to be sedated any more.”

Ryder kept her eyes closed as the pair went back and forth between them. Her body too heavy, too stiff to move. The fog of sedation still had a hold on her limbs if not her mind. 

_Seven days lost. Because someone thought it would be easier that way._

The thought made her heart rate quicken. Her anger could never be chained by mere drugs. It raged strong. The flames chased the fog back. Ryder’s eyes snapped open. Taking a deep breath, she pushed herself up, staring at her naked body covered only by a blanket. 

“Ryder!” T’Perro cried as soon as she realised the Pathfinder was awake. 

Ryder ripped the blanket away, bandages wind its way around her body, effectively mummifying her. One by one, all the needles and tubes that connected her to the bed were torn off. The machine behind her screeched its protest. Despite the dull ache all over, she shifted her legs towards the ground. 

“You’re too weak to leave. You have barely recovered.”

Drack folded his arms and watched. A smirk on his mouth. “Oh, she’s pissed all right. I told you so, Lexi.”

Ryder’s eyes flashed at T’Perro but pulled back to concentrate on getting off the bed. She kept her heavily bandaged right hand tight against her chest. Her left braced against the bed, she stepped down. For a moment, her legs wouldn’t hold her weight, the sedatives like anchors dragging her down to the floor. 

_Fuck._

Her left hand kept a white-knuckled grip on the bed. Drack pushed past T’Perro to come to her side. Without asking, he put one hand around her wrist and pulled her upright. Drack tilted his head at her. Ryder nodded once. They ambled slowly towards the door. 

“Drack, you know she is not healed,” T’Perro said, her voice curt and tight. 

They both ignored her protests and walked out the medbay. Ryder was exhausted by the time she got to her quarters. Thankfully, they met nobody along the way. Ryder sat on the edge of her bed, trying to catch her breath, the painkillers were already leaving her system. 

“Clothes?” Drack asked as he rummaged through her drawers. 

Ryder shook her head and crawled under the covers. The krogan lumbered over and pulled the blanket over her naked form. As Ryder closed her eyes, she felt a gentle claw stroking her hair. Her body craved sleep, as she drifted off, a deep resonating rumble filled her ears. 

For once, Ryder felt safe. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are always welcome.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated.


End file.
